Kids Say the Darndest Things

Having a toddler can be frustrating (okay, very frustrating), but it can also be amusing as talking comes into the picture. I got to spend a lot of quality time with my son last weekend, and I’ll be darned if I didn’t almost fall over laughing at some of the things he said. It’s really amazing what children can spout on their own without ever being taught.

The first was in the garage. I was working out with our weight set while he rolled around on his tricycle. I sat down after a few exercises, wiped my forehead, and stated to him, “Daddy’s pooped.” At this he rushed over to me, pointed at my butt, and said, “You pooped in your pants, Daddy?!”

Later on, as I was nearing the end of my workout, I said it again. This time I tried to explain. “It’s an expression, kiddo. When Daddy says he’s ‘pooped’, it means he’s tired.” There was a pause and a look of concern, then he replied, “No no, Daddy. Go poopy in the potty.”

After the workout, I decided it was such a nice day that I would take in some sun on the porch. Now, this isn’t something I normally (okay, ever) do, so he was confused when I took my shirt off and laid down in the sunlight. After a second or two of silence, he giggled and declared, “You’ve got sunshine on your ninnies.”

These are just examples, of course. He does this sort of thing all the time. Just the other morning, right after I finished my shower, he ran into the bathroom to tell me, “Daddy, your phone is beeping!” After pulling me into the living room (still in my boxers), he proceeded to dance about and giggle as the phone beeped. Only a toddler could get so much joy from of a voice mail reminder.

I guess I should expect this sort of thing out of my offspring. After all, at his age I was referring to myself as Super Hairy; why shouldn’t my son be just as silly as I was?

I’m curious to hear if anyone else has any humorous childhood statements to share. How about it? What are the funniest things your kids have ever said?

Oh…could I EVER tell funny stories. How much bandwith do you have?!!?

Hehe….just the other night Will and I were watching Dancing With the Stars. He was laying back on the couch, with his feet propped on the coffee table, acting like he was 14 instead of 4.

He looked at me nonchalantly and said, “I like watching Dancing With the Stars, don’t you Mom?”

“Yes, I do.” I replied.

“I like it when they do the hokey-pokey.”

I stifled a grin and looked at him. “Um, son I don’t think they do the hokey-pokey.”

He looks at me like I’m a complete moron. “Yes, they do. They did it last week.”

My oldest used to run into the house without his shoes on and announce to my mother that he was “barefootin’” even though he had never heard that old song.

Just the other day, Matthew (who is 15) declared, “Mom, you should have named me Foot.” “Huh?” was my intelligent response. “Well, Mom, then I could be FootSiess.” Our last name sounds like “cease.” Foot-sies. (Groan.) Gotta admit . . . it cracked me up.

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Kids do say the best things. My son is recently into the “is that a bad word?” phase…it’s so hard to keep a straight face.

Hugs,
Holly
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